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Grieving the
Loss of Your Pug
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| As a Pug owner myself, I am sure that I speak for most of us when I say that our Pugs are like family. In fact in most cases, they are like our children. When they are ill, we are the concerned parents who worry about their recovery as we give them their medication. When they are injured or require surgery, we sit anxiously in the waiting room while surgery is being performed hoping to get good news from the surgeon. So when our Pugs pass away and their loving spirits move on it is no wonder we are affected in the same way as when their human counterparts die. We grieve. It is because death is a part of the cycle of life that we wanted to provide some kind of support for those individuals whose loving pets have passed away. We were given a pamphlet that addresses just this subject called "Losing Your Best Friend" that is distributed by the Pet Loss Support Program which is sponsored by the Veterinary Medical Associations of Alameda County and Contra Costa County. Below are some excerpts from this pamphlet. We truly hope that you will find this to be helpful and supportive in your time of grieving. | |
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Your relationship with your animal companion is special, so the loss or impending loss of this beloved friend can be devastating. Whether your pet dies, is lost or stolen, or even must be placed in a new home, the painful feelings of grief can make this one of the most difficult times in your life. This may be especially true if you must make a decision to have a veterinarian end your pet's life due to sever illness or injuries. When your animal companion dies, grief even profound grief, is a normal and natural reaction. We derive much pleasure from the companionship of our pets and we experience their unconditional acceptance of us. Whether we are young or old, rich or poor, plain or beautiful, happy or cranky, they love us. Even so, friends and relatives may not realize how important your pet was to you, or understand the depth of your sorrow. Your grief is personal, but it need not be solitary. You can participate in a support group for people who recently lost a pet or are anticipating such a loss. Within the supportive atmosphere of a group of people experiencing similar feelings, you may explore some or all of the following issues. Reactions to Loss. . . . Grieving is the healing process that occurs after a loss Illness, death, or any other change in our relationship with a loved one causes emotions of grief. Each of us experiences the grief process in a unique way. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Grief may last from a few weeks to many years. Many people report feelings of shock, numbness, irritability, anger, guilt, sadness,fear, anxiety, loneliness, and/or depression. Physical sensations may include exhaustion, hollowness or tightness in the stomach or chest, weakness, headaches, appetite disturbances, and/or change in sleep patterns. People often report being haunted by their last experiences with the pet, replaying the final events over and over in their minds, or imagining that they still catch glimpses of the animal. Pet owners nursing an animal during the closing days of its life may experience any or all of these emotions in anticipation of their animal's death. Although all of these reactions are part of the normal grief response, many people are afraid that they are overreacting. Others find their feelings so intense that they are concerned that their pain will never diminish. Recovery From Grief . . . An important focus of the Pet Loss Support Group is sharing these feelings and concerns with others who will understand. |
The
first step in dealing with grief is to acknowledge your feelings. The
second is to determine what actions will best help you resolve your
pain. Many people are willing to offer well-intentioned advice, but only
you will know what best supports you. The Pet Loss Support Group
is a place where bereaved pet owners can share their memories, as well
as their thoughts and feelings, thereby discovering , for example, how
they would like to memorialize their pet, how they can handle the
reactions of those who do not understand their grief, and how they can
create empathy and support among their existing network of friends.
Some of the other issues which you may wish to explore include:
The Pet Loss Support Group meets the 2nd and 4th Tuesday of each month, from 6:30 - 8:30 pm in Walnut Creek. The exact location will be given when you phone the contact number. There is no fee to attend this support group. If you are interested in attending the group or would like more information about the Pet Loss Support Group, call (925) 932-0607 at any time. You will be contacting the office of Dr. Cecelia Soares, a veterinarian and licensed marriage, family, and child counselor who facilitates the group. This phone number is for the Pet Loss Group scheduling only, not for phone counseling. Phone counseling is available through the UC Davis Pet Loss Hotline at (530) 752-4200. |
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Reading List. . . . . . . . . . . . Maya's First
Rose When Bad
Things Happen to Good People Pet Loss: A
Thoughtful Guide for Adults and Children When Your Pet
Dies: How to Cope with Your Feelings Reading List for Children . . . . . . . . Explaining
Death to Children Life and Loss:
A Guide to Help Grieving Children Old Dog The Fall of
Freddie the Leaf Goodbye, Max The Tenth Good
Thing About Barney Charlotte's
Web All of these books are available through bookstores and libraries, except for the Quackenbush book which is only available through your veterinarian. |
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